Post by Eggman on Aug 13, 2009 20:45:55 GMT -5
A spotlight hits the center of the ring, just as a man in a superhero costume and a black trenchcoat swings in from the right on a rope, and lands to strike a heroic pose in the center of the ring. It is, of course, everyone's favorite egg-powered superhero, Eggman.
Eggman pulls a mic off of his utility belt, and raises it to his lips.
Eggman: So, I've done a little research on my trusty egg-puter back at the Fortress of Calcium. I'm in this triple-threat match, but from what I see, it's no threat to your friendly neighborhood Eggman.
You see, when you've been a hero for as long as I have, you learn that the best way to defeat your enemies is to research them and find their weaknesses. Well, I have done so.
Edgecrusher may be my only threat. I knew him back in the old AWF though, and trust me, all I really have to do is distract him with a midget. It doesn't even have to be a female midget.
Now, I say that Edgecrusher might be my only threat because I'm not completely convinced this Alex Mercedes even exists. I mean, come on, has anyone seen anything more than a picture? Does he ever show up and even tape a promo?
Against a janitor who's horny for midgets, and some guy who's no more than a name on a piece of paper? Eggman shall emerge victorious.
Eggman smirks, replaces the mic in his utility belt, and rolls under the ropes on his way out of the ring. He pauses and pulls a bag of hard boiled eggs from somewhere under his trenchcoat, and, happily munching away, walks out into the hallway where he trips over a pile of old newspapers on the floor. The pile of papers seems to speak, murmuring "No, dad, no! Stop kicking me!!"
Eggman: Where's Edgecrusher when you really need him?
Eggman wanders off down the hall, completely unaware of an old ad for Batman: The Dark Knight that has attached itself to his boot.
Eggman pulls a mic off of his utility belt, and raises it to his lips.
Eggman: So, I've done a little research on my trusty egg-puter back at the Fortress of Calcium. I'm in this triple-threat match, but from what I see, it's no threat to your friendly neighborhood Eggman.
You see, when you've been a hero for as long as I have, you learn that the best way to defeat your enemies is to research them and find their weaknesses. Well, I have done so.
Edgecrusher may be my only threat. I knew him back in the old AWF though, and trust me, all I really have to do is distract him with a midget. It doesn't even have to be a female midget.
Now, I say that Edgecrusher might be my only threat because I'm not completely convinced this Alex Mercedes even exists. I mean, come on, has anyone seen anything more than a picture? Does he ever show up and even tape a promo?
Against a janitor who's horny for midgets, and some guy who's no more than a name on a piece of paper? Eggman shall emerge victorious.
Eggman smirks, replaces the mic in his utility belt, and rolls under the ropes on his way out of the ring. He pauses and pulls a bag of hard boiled eggs from somewhere under his trenchcoat, and, happily munching away, walks out into the hallway where he trips over a pile of old newspapers on the floor. The pile of papers seems to speak, murmuring "No, dad, no! Stop kicking me!!"
Eggman: Where's Edgecrusher when you really need him?
Eggman wanders off down the hall, completely unaware of an old ad for Batman: The Dark Knight that has attached itself to his boot.
